First of all,
I am not a singer
and I can asure you, I will never become one

but there is this song
I wonna sing to you

and it's about times,
when you realize 
that the only thing you left is your busted heart 

but I've someone,
who never left my sid
and in this song I'm begging Him
to  

HOLD ON TO ME by for King & Country 

PS: enjoy

 

expectations

crying my soul out

they expect you to be brave
they expect you to look good
they expect you to be content
and to allways have a good mood

they expect you to be smart
they expect you to know all the things
they expect you to never fail
they expect you to do not expect anything

and where in all this is you?
the right choice
the right decision
the right way
the right reaction .. allways.

time to breathe - to make mistakes
and to learn ... how to do all this

expectations put your life into a box
with a very clear boundaries

don´t let them loose yourself
your own personality
don´t ask yourself
__how would react this person
or the other one ..even if you admire them

just ask yourself
how would I, ...................., react?
(add your name)

and do it  r.i.g.h.t.


Your LOVE sets me free.
_in every way_ thx God

the Feeling

when you get the feeling
that nobody wants you
and you wonna scream it out

the feeling
when your life is messed up
they forgot about you
seems like they don´t want you anymore
in their lives
and you feel SO ALONE
rejected by everybody

is it just that it isn´t as you planned it?

feel like useless
did they really forget about their promises
or it´s just life not letting them 

You never gave upon me
the people did
they still do

feel so unworthy
of anything
any kind of attention, care, favor...

miss you

Hole

 and I am feeling so small


DOES
It seems like I had everything,
I've ever wanted 
and now I am loosing it.

...everyday speech with my SISTA.
...good good friend- sharing everything 
with her.
...a boy who really wanted me.
...my 'crew' - bunch of people 
to have f.u.n. with.
...everything.

Is it just life going on - 
or all those things were wrong?
I don't feel like there is something replacing it.

There is a HOLE - growing in me
big hole
Don't know what to do.

I decided right...? 
    just as you told
I didn't wanna lose them
    you told me to...
        is it right.

Where are the things that made me HAPPY?


fb is not the thing I wonna replace it
    for, but I'm doing so.

...no other choice...? or the easiest one 
 

yes, it happens

F.I.N.A.L.L.Y.
or You Lord have just perfect timing

never thought before,
I would survive time (such a long long time like this)
without any knowing -
it would get any better

not saying i didn´t enjoy
the Time - but I knew it wasn´t right
I know I was such wrong

...didn´t know how to get out of it...

and when i REALISED ...........like month ago (or more)
that I need o get back :
it started to get a lot worst
I started to get a lot worst

I´ll be honest with you guys,
I stopped to believe in such a great-big-perfect christian conferences many years ago...
I allways had great time, but
that´s it.

...and now it´s interesting
how God is working,
how He can touch you - wherever He wants

I went there - TURBULENCIA 014
even there were so many barriers:
I was sick, feeling terrible, there was nobody from my home church etc.
...the conference was good - as allways...
but "it" didn´t happened
I wasn´t inside of it
I was watching from a very close outside

n.o.t.h.i.n.g.

but I knew that´s something is planned to happen
so it made me stay - I still don´t know why, how

the Very Very Very last call for prayer
was -The One-
"I found out that it wasn´t what I thought:
that I wasn´t able to recieve forgiveness
for I still felt guilty (I was looking for reason why I still can´t get back), but
I found out - that I wasn´t willing TO GIVE UP
I wanted to get back by myself
I didn´t realized that I need to pay the price for gaining my life back
my Lord back. The price for decision to stay separate (sainted)"

HARD ONE - yeah
it opened my eyes

YES, it came in the very same second.
I knew I was renewed
I was His - and He was mine
again

never want this to end!!!!

P.S. : since then I am the happiest person in this planet - I can asure you.
NEVER WONNA THIS TO END - walking every day, every second with my Lord is the best.
...will never understand how could I gave up upon it,
but now I know, that I never wonna lose it again.

Back To The Start

Crushing

don´t have to bother by reading this article
I know you won´t, BUT

there is just one thing
I finally found out that I am nothing
wtiout Y.O.U.
totally the biggest nothing you´ve ever seen

I need you!!!
more than you can imagine
so lost in my thoughts
so lost in my feelings
so lost in my atitude
so lost in my actions
so lost in my speeches
so lost..

I never thought I can do it by myself,
but I never realized:
I can´t do it without you!

little bit late,
but not too late

show me your g.l.o.r.y.
this is the only thing I am asking for

don´t ask for help
don´t ask for nothing else
I just need you in my life

sorry for all I´ve done
can you pls


forgive???

I love you.
I love you more.
I lve you the most.

...don´t deserve YOU.

Grab your life

...just afraid to show your love.

I am afraid,
you saw - she left me
it would be even worst
if I had a boyfriend.

I told you, better be without
then with a broken heart

without explainig
..just ingnoring
HURTS so much
never expected this heppining to me
she was my best friend
we were doing everything together
we were sharing everything together
she knew me the best

and now

n.o.t.h.i.n.g.

can´t even think...

this one - not now..

This was suppose to be about
L.I.F.E.
and it will
love life - with everything it brings to me
I know everything is
just the ways it was ment to be
but...

how to gain TIME?
this one is running
never coming back
wawing you - while you are loosing it
no. you can gain it:
it´s called *wisdom*
not the intelectual shit
...you cannot blow it :))
but really knowhow to use it
to

		take advantage of

it!!!

Love Life

make click in here: Love Life